Mindfulness exercises can seem like a big undertaking. The good news they don’t have to be! What is a mindful moment? Read on to learn more about what mindfulness is and why it is important for healthy parenting.
MINDFULNESS DEFINITION: a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.
Why Practice Mindfulness
The results of practicing mindfulness are easy to see. For children, the practice allows them to navigate difficult emotions, handle anxiety without getting overwhelmed, and build emotional awareness and self-knowledge, while experiencing and considering their feelings. They learn to slow down their response times in difficult situations and make better decisions before reacting, increasing cognitive flexibility and frustration tolerance.
For parents, practicing mindfulness means being more in control over your reactions to the stressful situations you encounter daily as an adult, feeling more connected and present with your family members, finding your body less tense throughout the day, and stepping fully into joyful moments with awareness and calm.
Despite its popularity, mindfulness can seem like a big undertaking. It often feels mysterious and out of reach. Many of us may find ourselves wondering how on earth we’re supposed to find a “quiet moment” to sit cross-legged and breathe amongst the busyness of our everyday life routines. If we did get such a moment for a mindful minute we’re scared of what may greet us when we actually pause, worried that if we’re not “calm and clear-headed,” then we’re not “doing it right.”
Good News: You’re likely already practicing!
Parents and caregivers practice mindfulness all the time, we may just not identify it that way because of common misperceptions about what everyday mindfulness is all about. That long eye gazes between you and your newborn… the tender nighttime snuggles and lullabies after dressing your little one in soft pajamas… the heartfelt hello and bear hug at school pick-up. You can follow mindful practice in your daily life each time you pick up one of Slumberkins’ social emotional learning books and connect with your child.
To kick off the new year, we’re inviting our Slumberkins Community to intentionally incorporate mindful moments into each day with your children! These moments enliven all your senses and include reflective questions and positive language from our friend Yeti for you and your kiddos to contemplate.
Mindfulness Meditation vs. Present Moment Mindfulness
Mindfulness exercises can be practiced in countless ways. The cross-legged variety, called Mindfulness Meditation, is only one of the many unique approaches to a practice whose benefits are as vast as they are ancient. The "present moment" is available to you anytime you want to bring awareness to what is happening in your inner and outer experience. Unlike those autopilot drives to work when we arrive in the parking lot with little recollection of our journey to get there, mindfulness training invites us to notice everything passing through our sensory doors — the sounds, smells, sights, tastes, body sensations, thoughts, and feelings — that we are experiencing right now.
Wait, so do all those experiences have to be pleasant and calm in order to be mindful? Not at all!
Say your toddler is melting down at the end of a long day. Notice your heart rate increase and the unpleasant emotions that may arise. Name them in your mind. Then take a few deep belly breaths, imagining any negative thoughts that arise moving from your head to your belly. Without judging yourself for having these thoughts, you might instead use positive language and a compassionate statement like, “I’m doing my very best at this moment. I'm OK.” Like watching a churning sea from a lighthouse perched upon a cliff, mindfulness allows you to experience tantrums or stressful situations without getting swept up by the tide. If you do find yourself losing your patience, the mindfulness technique allows you to notice that fact without criticizing yourself harshly and regroup — for that moment of impatience, too, shall pass!
Mindfulness training is about seizing the moment in everyday life, regardless of whether it’s calm, chaotic, or otherwise, and being kind to yourself through it. Over time and with mindful practice, you will notice a shift to a more tranquil inner state.
Join us this month for Mindful Moments with the Slumberkins Family!
“I’m doing my very best in this moment. I’m OK.”
I needed this line today after a sleepless night with my girl and a day of cat naps; a day where I felt like I wasn’t really nailing this whole mom thing.
Thanks Slumberkins for the message you provide to our babes and for us mamas as well.
I try to practice mindfulness by staying calm during the witching hours and remembering that crying is the only way my baby can express himself. I try to remember that if I stay calm I can hopefully make him feel safe.
Before my son was born, my baby-fever was sky high anytime I would see my eighteen-month-old niece. She was beginning to get wary of people she didn’t see on a regular basis, and her mom was the only person who could soothe her. I remember watching and hoping I can be that person of comfort to a child of my own someday.
My son is ten-months-old and has been struggling with his sleep. When he begins wailing at 2 AM, it’s not necessarily fun. However, as soon as I pick him up and he rests his head on my shoulder, I listen very closely to those last few whimpers he makes before falling silent. I embrace him and rock him gently, remembering this is what I wanted to become. Reminding myself I am his sense of comfort gives me a validation I must be doing this whole mom-thing somewhat right. Seizing this calm and loving bond my son and I share after every loud, high-pitch scream that he may let out helps ground me to remind me who I really am. It has definitely been helping to change my perspective during what I used to refer to as overwhelming moments.
This is such a powerful message!!! Not only will it help shape your children into better individuals but it will also help yourself feel better about being fully aware of certain situations and open all lines of communication in a positive way. Being mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us which is so important when raising a child.
Having a 2 1/2 year old while running my own practice has proven to be pretty challenging lately and has negatively impacted my blood pressure. I have begun to do mindfulness with yoga again and hoping to model mindfulness and yoga to her, since she watches everything I do. Also my awareness of the breath and tightness in my chest allows me to pause, reflect, not judge the feeling or situation or people involved, and let the calm wash over me.
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